More Thyroid Stuff

I had my pre-op yesterday for my thyroid surgery which is taking place next week. I was at the hospital for over two hours, saw a nurse and a consultant, and they couldn’t be more different in the answers they gave me to my questions:-

Q – How long before I can look after Jake on my own?
Nurse – 3-4 weeks
Doctor – A few days

Q – How long will I be in hospital?
Nurse – Probably 2 nights
Doctor – Possibly the same day, if not, the day after

Q – How long until I can go to the gym again?
Nurse – About a month
Doctor – Whenever you feel ready, just go easy on things that can stretch my scar

Q – When will my follow up appointment be?
Nurse – 6 weeks after
Doctor – 2 weeks because we are sending your biopsy off as urgent.

Hmmm, so I’m going to go with what the doc said I think.

Starting to feel really nervous. Not about the surgery, but the waiting and the results. I feel like I felt 9 months ago when I was waiting for my chest operation. I knew it was more than a cyst, I knew it was cancer, and I’m getting the same feelings this time. I know I can’t be certain of anything until I get my results, but I’m thinking the worst.

I said to the doctor yesterday: “Realistically, what are we looking at?” He kept using the word suspicious and that we could be dealing with a malignancy, but he’d be very surprised if it was lymphoma related as it didn’t respond to treatment, and again mentioned the 70:30 chance that it would be OK, but the more I think about it, the more I think that those aren’t great odds. Especially since this is me we’re talking about.  It was bad enough telling my mum I had one type of cancer, I don’t think I could handle telling her “Well actually, Mum, you know I had Hodgkin’s and I kicked it? Well now I’ve got thyroid cancer too.” Not really sure how she’d cope with that.

The last time I had a pre-op, I cried because of how big and scary the surgery was that I’m having. This time, I managed to wait until the car until I cried, and had a big cry today too.

It goes without saying that when I know, I shall be using the whole social network thing to let you all know!

I’m Back!

We are back from our holiday! We went to Nissi Beach in Cyprus. It was a lovely week and we had a great time, the only thing was that I missed Jake lots and lots.

We spent most of the week just chilling by the pool, me basking in the sun, Neil, hiding in the shade. We didn’t do any day trips, we didn’t go clubbing up the road in Ayia Nappa, we just relaxed. We hired a little buggy to get around in for the last two days which was a bit of fun.

 

Jake was a very good boy for his nanny and granddad. Neil’s mum and dad were kind enough to have him for the week, and my parents had him for two days as well, so they still got to see him. I think he’s glad to be home, he certainly seemed pleased to see us anyway.

 

My hair, as you can see, is getting quite thick now, although, there seems to be a lot more grey than I remember there being before. But it’s OK, because I’ve noticed Neil getting the odd one or two as well!

What else? I joined the gym today. Operation Yummy Mummy is actually going to commence. I’ve been putting it off for long enough, so it’s about time I actually got on and did something about it. Gym now, and then the diet starts in earnest after my thyroid op. Which leads me onto….

My thyroid op is on November 4th. I will be in for one or two nights. Although (and I haven’t told Neil this yet!) if they won’t let me out on the Friday, I am discharging myself anyway. I’ve spent enough time in hospital this year. I’m not really sure how I feel about my thyroid op just yet. I’m trying not to dwell on it too much, and I’m nowhere near as scared as I was for my last op. When I had my last op, I knew what the results were going to be, because everything pointed towards it. This time, I haven’t got a clue. I just keep reminding myself that the doctors say there’s a 70% chance of it being benign, so if that’s the case, I can just move on, finally! Here’s hoping!!

Guest Post #4

My lovely friend Amy has written a guest post (which actually made me cry!!)

My Friend Roz.

I asked Roz if I could write a guest post on her blog as I have been an avid reader of it since February, Roz is one of my Best friends and has been for many years (with a little gap in between where we lost contact for a bit) She was my Chief Bridesmaid at my Wedding in 2008 (I should have made her Maid of Honour but Family duties and so on…) She has always made me laugh, been there for me when I’ve needed a shoulder to cry on and someone sensible to ask for advice. She is a friend for life.

I remember the day before she found out she had cancer, I spoke to her on the phone and told her everything would be fine that there was no way she would have cancer and that she is too young and too healthy to have such a disease. She said she knew she had it. I said not to be silly, it couldn’t be.
How wrong was I, I apologise to you Roz if I gave you false hope, I was purely trying to stay positive.

I have felt at times useless, I live a distance away and have a baby daughter who takes up most of my time, which I know Roz understands being a parent herself. I sent Roz some flowers when she told me the news, I didn’t really know what else I could do to help, how do you help someone who is helpless at that moment in time themselves?

Roz’s journey has given me strength, I have had illness over the years but never something so serious as cancer, My mum passed away from a Brain Tumour in 2001 and seeing someone you love so much go through all the pain of treatment and it not get anywhere was heartbreaking., I didn’t want Neil or Jake or any of Roz’s friends and family to have to go through that.

I hoped that Roz would beat it, I knew that Roz would beat it.

You see Roz has always been in my eyes – Strong, Determined, Caring and Honest. She may not feel like that herself at times, but that is what I see. I knew Cancer didn’t have a chance, I knew that she would Whoop its ass J

I’d like to say a HUGE Thank You to those near to Roz for the support you gave her, the support I wished I could have helped with, The chemo trips, the scans, the blood tests, the doctor and hospital appointments, the being a physical shoulder to cry on.
Thank you Neil for supporting her through thick and thin and being Roz’s Rock and Thank you Jake for being so gorgeous and brightening your Mummy’s days with smiles.

Thank you Roz for writing this Blog and using it as a way to make people more aware about cancer and specifically Hodgkin’s, also because it means we can all travel your journey with you and understand your feelings and thoughts that we probably wouldn’t be able to understand otherwise.

I saw Roz last week for the first time since she got Cancer, we had a hug, we had a cry, we had a chat about the test results that were yet to be revealed, I refrained from saying “it will be ok” I didn’t want to jinx anything.

Roz is now in Remission, (YAY!) she still has to deal with her thyroid problems, and will forever be on edge in case the cancer makes a return visit, but I hope she knows that Myself, My Husband and even my Baby Daughter are always here for her, at the other end of the phone, a text, a face book message, a 4 and a half hour car journey away.

I am SO proud of you Roz, I Love You, Thank you for being my Beautiful Friend. xxx

Fight Like a Girl

I am really quite honoured to have been asked to be a Power Team writer for the Fight Like a Girl Club. Their mission is to: “to provide a loving, safe, and nurturing environment where women battling cancer and other life-limiting diseases, survivors, and loved ones can come together to share stories, experiences, advice, encouragement, and hope with one another. Men are warmly welcomed, as well.”

I have already posted my first blog there which you can read here. They have quite a big readership there, so to be accepted is a really big deal for me.

I’m sure some people are of the opinion that I should have kept a dignified silence throughout my “journey” (I actually hate that phrase!) and should not have posted so many personal things on this blog. I don’t think I’ve been that personal though, after all, I didn’t tell you when my periods came back (YAY!! I never thought I’d be pleased about that!). In fact, if you want really honest blogging, I suggest you take a visit to the lovely Lisa Lynch’s blog. I wish I had the confidence to write like she does! I think she’s fab!

The main reason for me keeping this blog was to help other people that might have just started their treatment. Part of the reason was to keep friends and family updated of my progress, and part of it was for purely selfish reasons in that I could look back over my time and, not necessarily look back to remember the bad times, but to remember how much I’ve achieved.

So yes, I could have kept a dignified silence, but I didn’t, and that makes me proud of myself. It might not make you proud of me, you might be disappointed that I didn’t handle it like you did/would, but you know what? I don’t actually care. I’ve handled this in my own way and I’m pretty sure I’ve handled it well, fighting like a girl all the way!